Family

Day 24 – However you Slice it

Becoming a Mama causes a huge priority shift, which I was totally expecting, but still adjusting to. You assume this whole new identity, and have to give away a little more of yourself than before you had that tiny human.

I’m gettin’ all Excel happy, hang with me…

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So I’ve always imagined myself as a pie (homemade apple, specifically) and the different parts of my identity make up the slices of the pie. Still with me?

Before I was a Mama my pie looked like the one above. I was equal parts Ordinary Radical, Wife, Self, Friend/Family Member and Employee.

At one time there were lots of other slices…Student, Teammate, Volunteer, Equestrian. But the pie doesn’t get any bigger. There’s only “so much” to go around, so some slices have to get smaller to make room for another. Back then my pie-self was a hot mess, running on little sleep and lots of coffee. But coffee and pie belong together you say…I know :) Your pie will take on a different shape as you move through different seasons of your life. Some slices might be taking up a bigger space in your pie – but we’re all trying to balance our slices, amen?

Three months ago I became a Mama. Now, where’s that slice going to fit?

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The purple is my Mama slice, one of the largest. And the green in my Self slice, the smallest. My Wife and Friend/Family slices also took a hit. In this season, my role as a Mama is the most consuming for obvious reasons. Little Dude needs care and attention almost 24/7. Which is all good, but as the years pass that slice will shrink a little, which makes me happysad all at the same time.

One thing I’m constantly working on is protecting my Wife slice. It’s almost too easy to steal from that role to make more room in the Mama space. I hold that belief that I’m a Daughter of the King above all, followed by Wife and then a Mama and so on.

I was having a conversation recently about how you’re “on your game” so many times at work, in your social life, and as a Mama that your closest relationship often suffers just because there’s no more of you to give. But that should be where you’re giving most, because that’s where you’ll get the most back, right? I want to be the best version of myself for Merfman. Will I always be the best? Nope, I’ll probably fail pretty often. But that’s the great part about love, it doesn’t keep track.

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Finding balance is a lifelong quest, and I’ll never get it perfect. But that’s part of journey, right?

Now…who wants apple pie?!

Family

Riley is 3 Months!

HOW? That’s a whole trimester! Well, it covers the “missing 4th trimester” theory ;)

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Weight: Bad Mama. I was planning to weigh him last week when we were at a baby store, since they have a scale. Well, I totally forgot. Mama Brain. What I do know, dude is SOLID. I’m noticing that his car seat is heavier and not as easy to haul around. We probably won’t be carrying him in it for much longer. He was 13lb 4oz at his last appointment, so I’ll guess that he’s over 15lb? He’s pushing the limits of his 6 month clothing. I bought him some winter outfits in 9 month size, hopefully that holds!

Health: Healthy! We got a NoseFrida which seems to be much less traumatic for the stuffy nose moments. He almost sort of likes it? Odd kid. I think we’re approaching the teething phase. He’s a drool monster, gnaws on his pacifier and is constantly shoving his hands in his mouth. I have some teething things ready, but from what I’ve heard he can be in this “pre-teething” phase for a long time. No fever yet – I’m watching for that since I know it’s often a sign.
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Sleep: 8 HOURS on Friday night. It was ah-maz-ing! We put him down at 9:30pm and he slept until 5:30am. I felt like a champion, like I could take on the world! For the week prior he’d been waking every 3 – 4 hours to eat. Lovin’ those growth spurts, and my Wonder Weeks App, ha. Naps are pretty consistent. We’re up around 7:00am, then he gets a short nap in the car on the 30 – 40 min drive to work. We get to the office and he takes 2 – 3 naps, either 40min or 1.5 hours. If it’s two naps it’s more like 2 hours each. Then a short nap on the drive home, and we have some extra awake time before bed and he goes down between 8:00pm – 9:00pm depending on how things are going. Fussy nights = earlier bedtime. That goes for both of us!
Nursing: Still going really great. After that 8 hour stretch I was hurting a bit though ;) Being a part of “Mama Culture” now makes me want to tell the new Mama’s all the things I didn’t know about nursing. It hurts at first. Don’t freak out when you pump hardly anything. It’s HARD. I remember hearing about how you need to reach out and get help early on if you’re struggling – but I didn’t know what struggling looked like. You can’t “practice” nursing before you have the baby, so what are you supposed to to? I feel like there should be mandatory house calls for new Mama’s. Where a Mentor Mama comes and checks in with you.  And the Mentor Mama’s should be new-ish to motherhood. Hopefully there’s Mom’s and Aunt’s and Grandma’s to talk to – but some things get forgotten, and it’s SO helpful to talk to a Mama that’s been where you are recently.

What Riley is up to: Lot’s of chatting! He’s also learned how to hold things. So he’ll grab his shirt or a blanket and hold on. It’s so simple but so adorable. He’s discovered his hands, and they’re pretty  much the best toy ever. If he’s awake, 80% of the time his hands are either in his mouth, or he’s clasped them together staring at them. He also likes to wring them together and stare off – sort of like he’s an evil baby genius plotting world domination. Well, at least that’s what it looks like. Bathtime is his favorite thing in the world. Not to be confused with ending bathtime and starting jammie time. That’s the worst time ever. He goes from pure joy splashing in the water to absolutely horrified that we have to remove him from his wonderland and clothe him.

DSC_0264A rare, happy jammie time

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Merfman + Merfbaby = <3

PostPartum: Still trucking along and getting ready for my Sprint Tri. It’s hard since I have limited time to train with Merfman working so much. I try to spend Sunday’s with my parent’s so they can watch Riley and I can train in the area near their house, since that’s where the race is. I’m eating cleaner, not 100% but probably 80/20. I fit into a pair of my pre-prego jeans two weeks ago, whoo! I’ve also tightened my belt loops and the waist strap on the Ergo, which is a good sign :) Emotionally I’m good – but I’ve heard about some hard stuff lately. A Mother of four with stage 4 cancer, parent’s planning memorial services for their babies. Rough stuff. It consistently helps me keep my little challenges in perspective. We all have hard stuff, some of us have harder stuff.

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Baby Gear: Carter’s winter clothing. My Mom and I took a trip to one of the Carter’s stores (dangerous place, people) and I got Riley some super stinkin’ cute outfits. He’s gonna look like a little lumberjack in his winter clothes! ErgoBaby Carrier – Merfman even wore it when we walked to coffee Saturday :) Activity Mat – now that he can see more and hit the toys it’s much more fun.

Thoughts: I was able to meet up with a Mommy Friend from our Bradley class last week and it was SO great. We spent the whole time trading stories and sharing baby milestones. We could even commiserate over losing all our hair, yea – that’s fun. Neither one of us thought we’d need Mama Friends, but we both shared how great it felt to talk to someone that’s in the same “place.” We’re hoping to keep getting together regularly, and maybe even be workout buddies :) It’ll be fun to see our babies grow together. They’re only 1 day apart!

Family

Day 23 – Financial Hope

Today I’m trilled to be sharing a story of hope on My Life (His Mission). Head on over to Kerry’s blog and check it out, she’s sharing 31 Days of Hope.

AND there’s a giveaway!!! I’m SO excited to be blessing someone with Financial Peace University. The best part? It’s the online class so you can do it on Baby Time, in your own home.

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Don’t you want to be WEIRD?!